Saturday, January 22, 2011

A few words

So..... I wrote my personal feelings about a situation going on with a friend, and without meaning to, hurt her in the process. I'm wholeheartedly sorry that she got hurt by reading what I wrote, and feel horrible. 

Although this blog is small, and read only by a few of my fellow lap-bandsters, I still tried to keep things anonymous by not mentioning names..... and changes names of others. Although 99% of what I write about is weights, measures, food, diet frustrations and my lap-band, 1% of what I've written is about stuff that is weighing heavily on me, and affecting me....... and perhaps that wasn't fair.

I had honestly thought that my following of a mere 31 people, all of whom I know from lap-band surgery support forums, were the only ones reading this blog. If I had any inkling at all that anyone that I knew in my personal life was reading it, well..... I probably would have taken the blog down entirely. And I did today.

I do feel horrible that my friend read my blog, and was hurt by it. I deleted that post, and it's gone forever. I couldn't possibly leave it up.

I may have assumed that only other lap-bandsters were reading it, and initially, I was embarrassed that people that I knew not only read my blog, but can see my pictures, my weights, my current weight, etc. Even my best friend had no idea that I had a blog. I never told anymore outside of my lap-band and diet forums about it, so I'm a little surprised to have found that people in my everyday life were reading it.

So I deleted my blog.

I hurt a friend by what I wrote here. Apparently, at least two people who are in my personal life (and perhaps more) have been reading my blog for who-knows how long, and all my personal feelings, trials, tribulations, etc., were being read unbeknownst to me. I feel like a teenager who's diary was just read by everyone in homeroom. Just plain embarrassed, and ashamed.

But then I thought about it.....

I feel very badly that what I wrote hurt a friend. I've made a step to show my remorse by deleting the post completely.

I feel a little weird that people I know are reading my blog. But then, does that discredit my journey with weight loss?

So I restored my blog.

I won't be writing about friends, neighbors, etc. 

However, I will not be ashamed of where my weight went to. I started this journey at 375.5. I'm not proud of that number, but without actually getting THERE.... I would never have gotten HERE. I am back to my low of 198, and the scale is steadily moving in the right direction. I will continue this journey, and this blog.

This blog is a testament of my personal journey with weight loss. I won't be embarrassed by my postings related to my weight-loss. 

I hurt a friend, and I am very sorry for it.



3 comments:

  1. Here! Here! I'm very glad you decided to put the blog back up. In this age of social media people are bound to get bent out of shape. I'm sure the frustrations you mentioned that weighed heavily on you IS relevant to your success with this journey. The trials and tribulations of what you go through in your daily life is what makes it relateable to the fellow lap-bandsters who not only deal with the weights, measures, food and diet frustrations but also the daily "drama" we all encounter - it's normal (and therapeutic) to talk about it. It's not like you're Perez Hilton spreading idle gossip!

    Cheers to you Karen! I'm proud of you for what you've done, and I have faith in you for what is yet to come!

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  2. oh, honey. i have been dealing with this too. i chose to share my blog with 3 real life friends because i thought it was important for them to understand the full picture to support me in real life. one has twice violated my privacy and burned me. i regret sometime sharing my blog with her because now i can't bitch and moan about her! lol.

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  3. Hey Hun...it's funny how people can sometimes get caught up in nonsense that is just ...well that non-sense. You have made an incredible transformation and that amount of change can be difficult for some people to handle because of maybe their own insecurities or whatever. If people started to focus on the real things in life that matter and how they can overall become better human beings instead of worrying about all this bogus nonsense the world would not be where it is at, and yes that is a tall order to think of, but we can all start somewhere by being accountable for our own actions. You vented ( which EVERYONE does) and You profusely apologized and that should be the end of it and this person honestly should do some thinking of their own and come to terms if they're not responsbile in some way for what or how it happened. Hoenstly if you ask me..you posted it on your own PRIVATe blog and even disguised this persons identity...its not like you posted it on your wall on facebook with a photo tag of the person !!

    Keep it going honey you're doing fantastic and an incredible role model to me and others on this journey !!!

    Love ya lots !!!

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